Long version(painfully honest):
Inspired by the various "Cure your homosexuality! Homosexuality is an illness! We have the meds!" - campaigns which has showed up in the last couple of years, we, a group of Norwegian save-the-vowels-activists*, have decided to declare war. It will be fought with words and pillows.
So far, we have developed, with great help from professor Extrem Elly G.Ayman, a cure to heterosexuality. Rejoice, people of the world, rejoice! You will find the cure in the journal. If not, simply add a comment asking for it, and we will be happy to send it to you.
Have a very gay year.
This is Help For Straights, signing off.